Unchallenged Lies Become Truth
Lies I was told and that I told myself have, and in some cases continue to, impact my perception of who I am. I was told from a young age that I was not a man. That I was more like a girl. That I was weak. That I was feminine. I felt that I wasn't good enough to be loved by my father and brother. I felt that I was more like my mom than my dad. I felt that women weren't attracted to me and that sex was something that was just for pleasure. I believed these lies which went unchallenged most of my life.
At age 35 I was an isolated, godless, pothead, gamer, rageaholic. I had lost most of my friends and was alienated from most of my family. My career, as a hair stylist, was falling apart and I was running out of money. I started wondering what the point of my life was but I still was not low enough to turn away from the weed.
I was raised as a Catholic but had long ago rejected Jesus and His Church in favor of a life of debauchery. I rejected Christ but never stopped believing in Him. The further into the darkness of addiction and the party lifestyle I fell the more I recognized that something was missing from my life.
At 38 years old I hit bottom. I was losing clients, was not making enough money to pay my bills, was making myself physically ill using drugs. I recognized that God existed and He had to have some plan for me rather then just getting by from day to day.
I began to pray again and asked Him to help me get off drugs and He did. I went from getting high every day for 10-15 years to completely stopping in just 7 days.
I recognized that God had done this for me because He had a plan for me. I am still discerning what that plan is.
As the drugs ended my sexual attraction to men grew stronger. I recognized the conflict between my attraction and my Catholic faith. % years ago I joined Courage and my life was, once again, transformer.
I still struggle but I now struggle up Christs holy mountain rather then wallowing around in the gutter. I have good relationships with my family again. New friendships. My career is back on track. Out Lord has done great things for me.
I am highly motivated to share my journey with as many as will listen to me through my blog posts, YouTube videos, and blog posts. Over the last two years I've started speaking publicly, for Courage, on a more frequent basis. I wanted a place to bring together all that I have to offer as far as content and that's what this simple website will make possible.
The video below, my testimony from the 2016 Courage Conference, goes into more detail.
Please reach out to me, by clicking the Contact Me tab at the top of this page , if I can offer advice , prayer, or if you would like to have me come speak at an event. Also click the links at the bottom of the page for my Twitter feed, Facebook page, and YouTube channel.